The Casual Relationship of this Generation

Previously posted on Mogul also:

https://onmogul.com/stories/the-casual-relationship-of-this-generation


There are a lot of things that we all criticize about dating today. It mostly revolves around commitment issues. People love to blame their ex for their broken heart and blame them for the way they are. So because of their ex, they can’t commit.

I fail to believe that this is the case.

Your ex isn’t the reason you don’t want to commit. You just want the fun without the stressors of a relationship. I can’t say I blame you. Relationships are stressful, and who needs them when we are young and beautiful. We can have whoever we want for the night. But you are the one who ignores the angel on your shoulder, and the others who listen to the angel…

 

 

A few drinks in…The devil says sleep with them, while the angel wakes you up in his or her bed the next morning saying you want a relationship and a future with someone.

Then there are other people who ignore the angel on their shoulder and listen to the little devil telling them that casual sex is exciting. The devil whispers to them telling them to escape into an emotionless, non-committable abyss.

I guess in today’s society sleeping around with people is normal? Its something “cool” people do.

Interestingly enough though, sleeping with someone and then listening to the angel on your shoulder and inevitably being rejected, isn’t the hurtful part. What hurts is when all of the people around you tell you that you are better than that. Obviously your girl friends are obligated to tell you that you’re amazing. But when all of your guy friends and even male co-workers look you straight in the eye and start telling you that you better than that, and him/her, it hurts you. Are they telling you, you don’t have the right taste in guys or girls?

If I am “amazing” and “the perfect girl that any guy would be lucky to have you,” why is he just sleeping with me?

It baffles me. Many girls and guys around me are great people. They are beautiful, smart, and fun yet their “significant other” won’t commit.

Maybe its the difference between men/women and boys/girls. But even that I am unsure of.

Maybe you have to do the 5 date rule before you sleep with him or her. But even that…

Maybe you have to act like you don’t care so he or she can chase you. But isn’t that childish?

Or maybe he or she just isn’t the right one. But that’s the hopeless romantic talking, who believes that one day prince charming will show up in her life. Childish?

I cant help but find hope in these situations though.

You slept them, so big deal. It probably wasn’t that great right?  Well he or she is just to caught up in societies norms blaming their ex’s for their destruction and addiction to casual relationships. He or she wasn’t able to see you were special. And you know what? That should make you want to show him or her and the rest of them that you are indestructible and you’re are going to be successful.  Show them all that you are a boss in your own life. Make those people that never saw your worth, regret not opening their eyes. Go make lots of money. Become a CEO of your future company or whatever you want in life. Be you and be happy.

At Last,

Brielle

Back In Time: First Day of School

August 18th, 2010

So today was the day I entered  the “real” Korean life. 학교 or Korean High School. 11 hours of being in an ALL girls school was an……experience. The experience is even more amazing because I’m a foreigner, as in, I look very different from everyone else in the school. Let me tell you about my day.

I woke up at about 6am. My host mother prepared breakfast for my host sister, Yoomi, and I. We arrived at the bus stop at around 7 am. These aren’t your basic school buses. The school buses are coach buses. Its a comfortable 15 minutes ride to school! Anyway, Everyone was starring, I wanted to laugh from the attention or maybe the sheer embarrassment. I couldn’t tell which feeling I was feeling. We stepped onto the bus, people continued to stare, then whispered and then smiled.

Once I got into my classroom, things got crazier and turned into…How can I put it? Madness? The girls would smile at me all shy and say “hi” or would just smile and walk away quickly. Some girls jumped in my face and started talking broken English to me. Then the homeroom teacher tells me “You and Kelly(the other exchange student with me at the school) will be making a greeting to the entire school in the gym in about 20 minutes.” She also mentioned that it needed to be in Korean and English, so I was freaking out just a little. I mean I had only been in the darn country for a month and speaking in front of a huge school in Korean was frightening. I had no idea what was going to be thrown at me! As she was telling me this everyone is starring and giggling. Thankfully the speech was short and successful.

I went to my first class. I didn’t understand anything. I am not even sure what subject it was. The second class was 영어(English), still didn’t understand anything. Of course the whole lecture was in Korean… then we had an hour and a half lunch. Which was filled with lots of stares again. Then we had Math and I actually got it, except later we had another math class and I was completely lost. Then we had a class on how to plan a party…..??? Yes really. Then break time again… then Korean class again and then math again. Long day, it’s even longer for regular students. There are another 3 hours of study time after the standard 11 hour school day.

Because of there strict sschool system, you would think a Korean school is very disciplined and calm,hahahahah

Hell no.It’s crazier than schools in America.

School

School Logo

I’m at an all girls school and most of the girls there don’t understand what is like to be in the presence of a handsome male. That might be over exaggerating, but girls in high school don’t date guys because you are looked down upon if they put their heart into a boy rather than their textbook. So they asked me, “ Do you go to school with boys?” and I said, “yes, I did.” and they screamed!!! Haha so bring up a boy, they go crazy! They are all screaming at each other all the time in the classroom during break, they tackle each other and play fight. It’s crazy. And we have a bunch of breaks with nothing to do, and then we do nothing in class. The class period is just the teacher lecturing, its so boring. Half the students sleep or are doing homework for another class, and the teachers really don’t care.

But I swear the girls at this school are amazing. One girl I just met gave me her pencil pouch randomly because I didn’t have one.<3 I made some awesome friends!

Ill leave it at that. I wrote a lot. Comment with love!<33

Friends 3If 지은 ever see’s this she might kill me. hahahaha <33

Friends 10

Me and 쌤

Friends 8

At Last,

Brielle

Why I Have Become a Feminist and How It Has Changed My life

If you think feminism is a bad thing and should be looked down upon, then you really don’t understand feminism at all.

Feminism- the advocacy of women’s rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men. (Google)

With so much backlash on this video of the girl being catcalled in NYC and other recent events in my life, I have really began to notice the inequalities of women. I truly believed that women were equal to men, but in the past 5 months that belief has been changed.(Thank you for college!) I assume that because I am taking a women history class, my eyes have opened up into this new world of inequalities. Where to begin…….

As I was discussing work life with my co-workers last night, my friends boyfriend was telling me how I had to stick up for myself. He told me to tell the boys in the back of the house to, “fuck off, or shut up” because he does it all the time and thats how he gets respected. And you know what I told him, “Its different for you. You’re a guy. If I did that, I would get fired right then” I never thought those words would come out of my mouth,“Its different for you because our genders are different” Thats makes no sense logically, but in social terms, it makes complete sense. Women are looked down upon especially in the work environment I have been in working in lately. On top of this, I realized that my managers, who were women, never had a say in anything against my male boss. An inequality I never noticed until I took this women’s class.

I don’t mean to categorize all men into being ignorant or anti feminist. However, a lot of men and even women, are ignorant to the inequalities. The catcalling video in NYC when she walked around for 10 hours and was yelled at more than 100 times was not a stunt or a lie. Women, even myself, get catcalled all the time. And I realize there are people that are just being nice ,but we don’t want to stick around and hope that you are the nice one. About 10% of the guys that catcall a women are genuine. However, guys don’t see this issue as a big deal because women “ask” for it or because thats “human instinct.” Its just a simple thing called respect. I know that not every guy catcalls a girl, but the video gave insight. Women get catcalled everyday and it is not comforting. It makes women scared to walk down the street alone.

I am a feminist. I am not ashamed to represent women’s equal rights, and neither should you. Feminism isn’t just a women thing, Men can be feminist too. For example, Joseph Gorden Levitt is a huge advocate for feminism. It is a simple term or thing that represents the fight for equal rights.

You wont see inequalities if you turn your head and look the other way. So look at it straight in the eyes and really think about situations. Let it set in.


At Last,

Brielle