As Tinders time (I believe) is coming to an end, or maybe just an end in my life, I realize that I have a lot to thank Tinder for. Because of that app, from my 21 year old self to now, I have dated a lot and learned a lot.
It introduced me, and probably you, to a lot of assholes. But with all the bad Tinder has given us, the infamous app has changed dating and taught us all something.
Thanks to Tinder, I have had so many experiences that have allowed me to write this blog. So I will sum up my Tinder days with 3 guys that taught me a little about life.
Thanks to Tinder, I fell into an unconventional long distance relationship with what I thought to be the “perfect guy”… who inevitably hurt me. And “hurt” may be an understatement.
Tinder gave me my first real heartbreak, and I hope to never experience anything like it again.
Its cliche to say, but that awful experience made me stronger.
Heartbreak is a unique feeling that at the time I didn’t understand, so I struggled to cope with it.
This relationship taught me not to have so many expectations in a person. It taught me not to get caught up and obsessed over a guy, because it’s never worth it. No one is perfect. And no one is worth throwing everything into when they can so easily take it away in the matter of minutes.
Tinder took my virginity. Unfortunately to a guy that is the example of the type of guy not to date.
Tinder introduced me to a guy that would take advantage of my kindness. He would abuse and manipulate me and I let it be. At the time, I thought it was supposed to be like that. My kindness and understanding personality gave him the ability to do whatever he wanted, like cheat on me, right behind my back(literally). And my ignorance let him abuse the choices I had over my own body. Unintentionally, he taught me that I am beautiful, smart and strong, but that I was naive. No one should make you feel guilty for making a choice regarding your own body.
But thanks to Tinder I found someone that showed me a much better version of a guy.
Tinder gave me my first actual relationship, that just didn’t work out. He showed me how much I changed, and solidified my reasons on why I am so cautious and picky with letting people into my life romantically. He showed me what it is like when a guy actually likes you: No games, no chasing, no avoiding the relationship “status.”
He taught me that Tinder isn’t and will never be the place to find a boyfriend. Because if we are on tinder, we are lazy. We are on there because it’s simple and easy to find people. But relationships aren’t simple or easy. They require constant work and attention. You can’t delete relationships for a few weeks and come back when you feel like it, like you do with Tinder.
I must note, that other dating apps are somewhat successful because they require more work. Tinder is just simply too easy to set up compared to other apps.
My “finale” on of Tinder exhibited that for me a relationship and having a boyfriend is a big deal and I don’t take it lightly. If I invest in you, I will be loyal. Any yes, I expect there to be bumps in the road and I will work through them with you. The other person has to feel the same though. If problems arise in a relationship, you should work it out and fix them, not back out and break up. That’s just lazy.
So in the end, it makes sense that when finding a boyfriend or girlfriend via Tinder you are likely to get a “lazy” person. I can’t deny that I was being lazy and casual when looking for someone. I was scared to take it serious. But when it came down to being serious, I was ready. I committed.
I constantly wondered why men just seem to drop out of my life as if I didn’t matter. Without an explanation. Without a solid reason. One second everything’s fine and the next it’s over. The answers right above. Tinder is simple and people are lazy. They don’t want to try to fix things, they’d rather delete them.
In the past I have deleted the app and downloaded it again, multiple times.
This time I have to say I’m pretty confident I won’t be going back. My Tinder time is up. My hearts to big for that lazy app.
Despite all the upset that damn app has caused me, I can confidently say I am not that naive, clueless, innocent girl anymore. So thank you Tinder.
I hope you are enjoying my journey. ❤