I totally apologize for the semi-depressing post. A girl needs a few once in a while though. :]
I run towards long distance relationships.
Yes, the sentence is correct in every single way possible. I am attracted to distance. I don’t exactly know why, but I assume it is because I am not ready to make a complete commitment to someone. I am scared. I also hate the idea of having to get to know someone through the rigorous act of “dating.”
Distance is just comfortable. You get to know someone from afar. Over text messaging, facetiming, and phone calls.
I have tried the long distance thing a few times. They were never complete “relationships”, we were just “talking” or “dating” you could say. One particular person still dwells in my mind.
He was my prince charming. Oddly enough, we met on Tinder, and he lived 5,000+ miles away. He was my idealistic guy. Maybe I just idealized him. But in any case, he was special. He took me by surprise and swept me off my feet.
Unfortunately or obviously,
He hurt me.
He let me down.
I lost trust in him.
We had only talked for 3 months. We’d talked about doing long distance and he bought a ticket to come see me.
He didn’t pull through and none of that happened.
There has been something that I have learned from this though!
Distance and the amount of time you have been together does not define your relationship.
Someone might ask me, “How long have you known each other?”
“3 months.” I reply.
I feel like someone might judge me for saying that, as if 3 months is an insignificant amount of time. And that I had never met him face to face, so they assume it will be easy for me to move on.
I’ve known people to be in 3+ year relationships, but they walk away from their partner without any heartbreak. Time doesn’t matter.
You could be with someone for years and not experience the happiness you might spend with someone for a night or even 3 months. You might never see someone, but when you are sharing the details of your everyday life with that person, EVERYDAY, and you develop a special relationship with them.
I might not have ever met this person for real or have I known him for years, but he is still kind of sort of special to me. :] I walk away from our relationship knowing that we were good together, but were never able to stay together. The future does not calculate certain people in. Our futures did not make room for either of us. Maybe one day, destiny or fate (if I believed in that) might bring us back to each others lives. But today we are in our own corners of the world living our own lives.
I’m sad I lost a friend, but I am happy. I am young, beautiful, and smart. Any boy would be lucky to have me by his side. I want to travel the world, kiss lots of boys, drink lots of alcohol, and take lots of chances.
So I’ll just escape. Pack my bags and head out. Bye Felicia.